Most women wait all year for the day that their significant others get to show their love. We put up with all of their chest bumps, grunting, snorting, farting, and gorilla behavior so that one day of the year we actually get a SENSITIVE mate. We in theory should get tokes of their affections, you know, like flowers, chocolates, back massages and fancy dinners. If you are attached to an outdoorsman, you are more likely to get a bouquet of Ponderosa boughs, dead animals, an exhilarating hike through bear infested woods, and fried road kill for your tokens. I think that outdoorsmen are similar to cats in that they will present you with a dead carcass and expect to be petted. Keep this in mind when you un-wrap your Valentine’s Day gifts from the CAMO man. He really is trying to impress you in his own special, creepy way. The best thing is all you have to buy is a new design of camo for him, wrap it in camo paper and you have the happiest outdoorsman this side of the Mississippi! I would highly suggest making him buy your dinner before giving him his new camo….Or else he will want to go try it out his new camo and forget all about your hot date!
On the first day of Valentine’s Day my CAMO love sent to me:
A Mountain Lion in a Pine Tree
On the second day of Valentine’s Day my CAMO love sent to me:
2 Dead Mallards
And a Mountain Lion in a Pine Tree
One the third day of Valentine’s Day my CAMO love sent to me:
3 Blazing Shotguns
2 Dead Mallards
And a Mountain Lion in a Pine Tree
On the fourth day of Valentine’s Day my CAMO love sent to me:
4 Sets of Camo Panties
3 Blazing Shotguns
2 Dead Mallards
And a Mountain Lion in a Pine Tree
On the fifth day of Valentine’s Day my CAMO love sent to me:
5 Golden Hooks
4 Sets of Camo Panties
3 Blazing Shotguns
2 Dead Mallards
And a Mountain Lion in a Pine Tree
On the sixth day of Valentine’s my CAMO love sent to me:
6 Earthworms Wiggling
5 Golden Hooks
4 Sets of Camo Panties
3 Blazing Shotguns
2 Dead Mallards
And a Mountain Lion in a Pine Tree
On the seventh day of Valentine’s my CAMO love sent to me:
7 Elk a Rutting
6 Earthworms Wiggling
5 Golden Hooks
4 Sets of Camo Panties
3 Blazing Shotguns
2 Dead Mallards
And a Mountain Lion in a Pine Tree
On the eighth day of Valentine’s my CAMO love sent to me:
8 Labs Shedding
7 Elk a Rutting
6 Earthworms Wiggling
5 Golden Hooks
4 Sets of Camo Panties
3 Blazing Shotguns
2 Dead Mallards
And a Mountain Lion in a Pine Tree
On the ninth day of Valentine’s Day my CAMO love sent to me:
9 Head Mounts Mounted
8 Labs Shedding
7 Elk a Rutting
6 Earthworms Wiggling
5 Golden Hooks
4 Sets of Camo Panties
3 Blazing Shotguns
2 Dead Mallards
And a Mountain Lion in a Pine Tree
On the tenth day of Valentine’s Day my CAMO love sent to me:
10 Beaver Pelts
9 Head Mounts Mounted
8 Labs Shedding
7 Elk a Rutting
6 Earthworms Wiggling
5 Golden Hooks
4 Sets of Camo Panties
3 Blazing Shotguns
2 Dead Mallards
And a Mountain Lion in a Pine Tree
On the eleventh day of Valentine’s Day my CAMO love sent to me:
11 Squirrel Tails
10 Beaver Pelts
9 Head Mounts Mounted
8 Labs Shedding
7 Elk a Rutting
6 Earthworms Wiggling
5 Golden Hooks
4 Sets of Camo Panties
3 Blazing Shotguns
2 Dead Mallards
And a Mountain Lion in a Pine Tree
On the twelfth day of Valentine’s Day my CAMO love sent to me:
12 Fly Rods Casting
11 Squirrel Tails
10 Beaver Pelts
9 Head Mounts Mounted
8 Labs Shedding
7 Elk a Rutting
6 Earthworms Wiggling
5 Golden Hooks
4 Sets of Camo Panties
3 Blazing Shotguns
2 Dead Mallards
And a Mountain Lion in a Pine Tree
Good Luck!! I hope that you are just as lucky as me to have an outdoorsman in your life!! Happy Valentine’s Day!!
Kristen Berube lives a crazy, laugh-filled life with her outdoorsman husband Remi and their three camo-clad children in Missoula, Montana. A graduate of Montana State University and the Northern Alberta Institute of Technology, she loves being a mom and enjoys hiking, fishing, and camping. “Confessions of a Camo Queen: Living with an Outdoorsman” is her first book. –
It is available for purchase at: http://www.amazon.com/dp/1560376287/ref=tsm_1_fb_lk
